Thursday, February 28, 2008


My entry today is on a common health problem in any woman in this world: ENDOMETRIOSIS. 


I was diagnosed with endometriosis back in 2005 after complaining of a severe back pain and period pain.  Upon further checkup, we discovered a fibroid / cyst, not too big, but could be the cause of the pain. So, I decided to have an operation to remove it.  My main objective was to let the pain go, cause it is so unbearable.   It’s like a waste of pain, meaning, to have a pain some-what-similar with labour pain, but no child was born!


After operation in July 2005, I was given a rest for a month, and medical injection for 6 months to control the endo.  I was so relieved, finally it was over. I mean the pain.  Not for long though. Exactly a year after the first operation, I had again the some-what-similar period pain in July 2006! After bearing the pain for another 3 months with the help of painkillers everyday, I decided to consult my gyne again in Nov 2006.  Looks like the fibroid / cyst is back. Bigger this time.  So, Jan – Jun 2007, we started the medical injection again for another 6 months to control the growth.  I was so happy that upon checkup, it was smaller again. 


I decided to take a traditional nutrient supplementary which was believed to help in woman’s health. I related to a story by a friend who consumed this supplementary and felt easy and healthy and also managed to conceived. I took the supplementary for less than a month, and suddenly, in July 2007, the pain is back!  The pain was so excruciating at the right abdomen that the doctor first diagnosed it was appendix.  I have been hospitalized for a day for observation, but then, the doctors realized it was not appendix but my ‘long-love’ endo.


My appointment with the gyne in Aug 2007 revealed that it had grown 3 times bigger than before.  I could take a few medical prescriptions to control the growth or I could have another operation to remove it. I took the first option.  Now, in Feb 2008, after 6 months, it was back to small again.  I have totally stopped to take the prescription related to endo for exactly 10 days now. There are back pains occasionally (like yesterday and today) but I can still bear it without painkillers.


Since the cause of endo remains unknown, the right treatment for each individual is also depends on her own symptom and need.  I had endo-diagnosed friends who :  gave birth to twins, gave birth to triplets, gave birth 9 months after endo-operation, conceived but miscarriage after 12 years of marriage, had an only child after 9 years marriage.  As for me, I will still continue with the treatment and will not lose hope.


To read more about endo, refer to 

Thursday, February 21, 2008

Why Am I Being Tested?

I received an email recently about ‘Why am I being tested?’ which I posted here to share it with everybody. Who ever compile this, thanks a lot and may you get the pahala from Allah SWT.


QURAN MENJAWAB :"Apakah manusia itu mengira bahawa mereka dibiarkan saja mengatakan; "Kami telah beriman," ("I am full of faith to Allah") sedangkan mereka tidak diuji? Dan sesungguhnya Kami telah menguji orang-orang sebelum mereka, maka sesungguhnya Allah mengetahui orang-orang yg benar dan, sesungguhnya Dia mengetahui orang-orang yang dusta."(Surah Al-Ankabut ayat 2-3)


QURAN MENJAWAB :"Boleh jadi kamu membenci sesuatu padahal ia amat baik bagimu, dan boleh jadi pula kamu menyukai sesuatu, padahal ia amat buruk bagimu, Allah mengetahui sedang kamu tidak mengetahui."(Surah Al-Baqarah ayat 216)


QURAN MENJAWAB :"Allah tidak membebani seseorang itu melainkan sesuai dengan kesanggupannya. "(Surah Al-Baqarah ayat 286)


QURAN MENJAWAB :"Janganlah kamu bersikap lemah, dan janganlah pula kamu bersedih hati, padahal kamulah orang-orang yang paling tinggi darjatnya, jika kamu orang-orang yang beriman."(Surah Al-Imran ayat 139)


QURAN MENJAWAB :"Dan mintalah pertolongan (kepada Allah) dengan jalan sabar dan mengerjakan sembahyang; dan sesungguhnya sembahyang itu amatlah berat kecuali kepada orang-orang yang khusyuk"(Surah Al-Baqarah ayat : 45)


QURAN MENJAWAB :"Sesungguhnya Allah telah membeli dari orang-orang mu'min, diri, harta mereka dengan memberikan syurga utk mereka... "(Surah At-Taubah ayat : 111)


QURAN MENJAWAB :"Cukuplah Allah bagiku, tidak ada Tuhan selain dari Nya. Hanya kepadaNya aku bertawakkal. "(Surah At-Taubah ayat 129)


QURAN MENJAWAB :"... ..dan jgnlah kamu berputus asa dari rahmat Allah. Sesungguhnya tiada berputus asa dari rahmat Allah melainkan kaum yang kafir."(Surah Yusuf ayat 12)

Friday, February 15, 2008

A Stressful Week

It has been a stressful week. Last week, we only worked for 3 days, and the next 4 days were spent to celebrate CNY. Nonetheless, we still need to struggle with the heavy traffic jam during the journey back to KL on Sunday last week. So, the wonderful 4 days holiday was ended wretchedly.


This whole 5 days were used to struggle with whatever outstanding for this week and also last week. I had all the illness diagnosed for stress.  Headache, back pain, sleepless night, distraught, worn out at night. It has been so stressful that I mentioned to babyF that I plan to quit my job.  But babyF consoled me ‘No Mama, you have to work.’ My family has been very supportive. BabyF has been doing her homework by herself. Although dinner is cooked, it was not served on the table as usual.  HubbyA took his dinner on his own from the kitchen. I slept on the couch even before News at 8 pm ended.


Thanks my darling babyF and hubbyA for your understanding.  I plan to buy them a gift today as an appreciation for all the support they gave me this week. I will spend the rest of the day today to finish up everything or at least to sort out some of the outstanding issue so that my weekend ahead is not disrupted again.


So ROFI, work hard, work smart and all the best to me!

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

When I Think of The Day

When I think of the day

My heart grief for the lost in round

You never stopped remind me

It’s not the gift that matters but the honor that counts


When I think of the day

The happiness I felt with orange in my taste

Your words still linger

Knowledge is all you crave


When I think of the day

The life ahead is not a wonderland

You give me trust to set my path

The choice of life is in your hand


When I think of the day

You hold my hands in love and in pain

You bid me farewell you bid me goodbye

My tears shed for your last words in your eyes

Wednesday, February 6, 2008

A Sincere Prayer for Sharlinie

After Maghrib prayer yesterday, I asked babyF to recite the doa. So, confidently she recites the prayer for us.

'Ya Allah, selamatkan lah adik Sharlinie ya Allah. Pulangkan balik dia kepada mama dan ayahnya dengan selamat. Kalau tak, nanti mereka sedih ya Allah.'

Translation : Dear Allah, please help to secure adik Sharlinie. Bring her back to her mommy and daddy safely. If not, they will be sad, ya Allah.

Her prayer touched my heart. Of all the prayer she always say, she has chosen this very special one. We have not discussed about Sharlinie for quite some time, so I am quite shock when Sharlinie's well being is one of top priorities in her doa.

Adik Sharlinie Mohd Nasyar has been missing since 9 Jan 2008. All good Malaysians have been praying for her safe return to her family. As a muslim, doa is our weapon. As a community member, we really need to take care of our community, cause there is no guarantee that this will not happen to us also. Na'uzubillah.

My sincere pray to all little ones out there.

Tuesday, February 5, 2008

Sleepy Head

I am so sleepy now and cannot think properly. The day started off not so good. I woke up late and early in the morning, I had a quarrel with BabyF. Anyway, as I don’t want her school day to start in this manner, I talked her over, and we were happy again.

Then, hubbyA mistakenly took my car keys with him when he sent babyF to school. Well, that’s not the problem, I can just get the spare keys and get going to work, right? But, things will always disappear when we start looking for it. I couldn’t find the spare key!!! I’m so sure I have it in the cabinet, but I couldn’t find it. While searching, hubbyA came back and apologized for taken the keys. No problem honey! But I still putting a long face for not able to find the spare keys. Sorry darling…

So, I took off to work nearly 7:40 am. Too late actually. It’s hard to reach office by 8:30 am except when it is off-day. Another misfortune, I reached office at 8:35 am! Well, maybe for other people, it is just 5 minutes late, but for me, it means 1 bad-point, which, if accumulated to a certain count, it will jeopardize my bonus and increment for next year!

Now, let me think, why am I so sleepy today? Yeah.. now I remember, I don’t have a good nite sleep last night. I woke up in the middle of the night and cannot get back to sleep. It took a few turns left and right before I doze off in a not-so-deep sleep.

The entry today acted as a reminder to me. What ever happen early in the morning, don’t let it influence you for the rest of the day. So, here I am, writing this entry so that I could overcome my sleepy head, get on with work before the day ends at 5:30pm.

Come on ROFI! Get your head thinking!

Monday, February 4, 2008

Eye on Malaysia

On Sunday afternoon, 13 January 2008, we visited one of the attractions created for Visit Malaysia Year 2007, the Eye on Malaysia at Taman Tasik Titiwangsa, Kuala Lumpur. It is such a magnificent structure, so well managed by a bunch of dedicated staff with full of hospitality.

The scenery from the sky is superb. The Petronas Twin Tower, Istana Budaya and Menara Kuala Lumpur are all tall and ego. The jogging track along the lake is all paved beautifully.

BabyF did say something that struck me. 'Mama, too bad that not many people visited this place. ' At the time when we arrived, we no need to queue up long. There were 4 families including us, and a troop of school children from a religious school. We all departed on the same round. After our round, there’s only two couples coming towards the empty row.

Yes, too bad that not many people appreciated it. Or maybe, not much publicity given to this place and no other activities were carried out to attract people coming to this Tasik Titiwangsa. So, babyF, hubbyA and me prayed together, that other people will notice and appreciate it as long as it is still here to enjoy.

Saturday, February 2, 2008

Bicaraku Dengan Malam

Selamat hai malam
Kau setia padaku saban hari
Membelai naluri, melayan sukma dalam gelodak hati
Di mana tiraimu?
Di hujung sore, pada tabir jingga
Atau di lembaran hijau daun goresan embun
Atau di ruang warna pekatmu?
Pada dirimu ada rahsia tersendiri
Apatah lagi pada diri insani yang rahsianya kau simpan
Setianya kau malam!
Hadirmu tiada siapa yang peduli
Bicaramu tiada siapa yang mengerti
Tiraimu tiada siapa ingin hayati
Warnamu diperguna oleh insani
Mengeraskan hati
Memadamkan naluri
Membutakan sukma
Beginikah nasibmu malam?
Sedang warnamu adalah pelangi hati
Heningmu santapan nurani
Gemersikmu alunan sukma
Hanya jika

Insani mengerti